Swords Reversed Meditation

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Iโ€™ve been having a rough go of it with emotions relating to my self esteem/identity and unresolved hurts from both childhood and a previous relationship. Some of these things I have outlined on here in previous posts. Part of the reason why Iโ€™ve had a rather long absence from posting is I just did not want to face any of it. Cancer season is emotional. I really donโ€™t like talking about my feelings. Well, I can talk about them in an abstract and clinical way. I just donโ€™t want to feel them. But tonight I gave up fighting it and just sat there and listened.

The meditation was an improvised thing. I was praying/meditating and pulling cards for guidance on why Iโ€™ve been so destructive. Towards the end of the reading two cards came out. Ten of Swords, Three of Swords. Both reversed.

Pull these swords out.

Clear as day. So, I put those two cards at the top of my desk. Studied them. Felt them. And just went with it.

I closed my eyes and returned to shuffling.

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